Monday, January 31, 2011
40 is the new 20
No reason to frown over my age, according to the Today Show. 40 is the new 20 and we are fabulous!! I knew it! No reason to dress "my age" and look all frumpy when I can dress like a teenager, go clubbing and compete with the barely-old-enough-to-be-there girls....OK, dream on! But the thought is good, and now I don't feel quite so old.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
R-E-S-P-E-C-T
I don't care that I am not rich and famous, hold a important position in large corporation or otherwise have a big impact on the outcome of today's worldly activities. I am happy being who I am. I make decent wages, I am a good mother, I am a good friend, sister and daughter (still struggling a bit with the "good girlfriend", but we'll get there).. I am lucky to have great friends and family, and although more money would always be welcome; power or fame is not something that appeals to me.
However, I do expect to be respected for who I am and what I do. I am too old to take people's crap because they think I should! I was born with a big mouth, so when I think about it, I have never really been good at taking any one's crap.
Ask nicely, and I will help you. Show some empathy for others, and I will be understanding of your difficulties. Listen to other people's thoughts and ideas, and I will hear what you have to say. Treat me good, and I will work hard for you. But I refuse to be any body's scapegoat, to be talked down to or bossed around. I will not do an ounce of work for any ass who thinks "they're all that" because of a title.
Some of the most gracious people I have met in my life have been the higher ups in large corporation. They all had two things in common - they had high expectations of themselves and all who worked with or for them, but they also made people around them feel capable and empowered. Isn't that a funny thing?
So I'm not exactly looking for the same respect as Aretha was, but felt the need to spell out the word nonetheless. I said before that respect is earned, and that is true for ourselves too. Respect yourself and live up to your own expectations, and the respect of others will soon follow.
However, I do expect to be respected for who I am and what I do. I am too old to take people's crap because they think I should! I was born with a big mouth, so when I think about it, I have never really been good at taking any one's crap.
Ask nicely, and I will help you. Show some empathy for others, and I will be understanding of your difficulties. Listen to other people's thoughts and ideas, and I will hear what you have to say. Treat me good, and I will work hard for you. But I refuse to be any body's scapegoat, to be talked down to or bossed around. I will not do an ounce of work for any ass who thinks "they're all that" because of a title.
Some of the most gracious people I have met in my life have been the higher ups in large corporation. They all had two things in common - they had high expectations of themselves and all who worked with or for them, but they also made people around them feel capable and empowered. Isn't that a funny thing?
So I'm not exactly looking for the same respect as Aretha was, but felt the need to spell out the word nonetheless. I said before that respect is earned, and that is true for ourselves too. Respect yourself and live up to your own expectations, and the respect of others will soon follow.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Super Mom
The other night I watched 20/20's series about Homeless Teenagers. If you haven't seen this, it is worth watching. My heart breaks watching these four kids try to be adults, all while dealing with more baggage than anyone should ever have to. Be their own parent, raise themselves and take full responsibility for their lives. I wish I could have 5 minutes in a room with each one of their parents just to unload and tell them what horrible people they are!!
None of us are perfect parents. We all make mistakes, say things we know we shouldn't, do things that probably does not always gain our children, and I suspect, never have enough time for them. But we try. My kids know there is no one who loves them more than I do. They know I will keep them safe, fed and clothed. They know they have rules to follow and limits on what they are allowed to do and watch because some things are not for children. They know that I expect them to always do their best in school and in all their activities (no I am not Chinese, but I do believe children need to be pushed to reach their full potential). They know that I will listen to their input (read arguments), but that I as their parent, have the final say, because I am the adult. So with all my faults, my children are still blossoming into wonderful preteens. Question is, will we survive the teenage years?
I am pretty certain they will turn out OK. There is nothing they could ever do, that would make me stop loving them. Nor anything that would make me even consider putting them on a bus to nowhere. What is wrong with people who expect young children to care for themselves? I understand that teens can be difficult; that some get caught up in drugs and violence. But if that happens, get help! Kicking them out on the street cannot ever be the solution, can it? I am not one who thinks it's OK to make excuses for kids' behaviour. They need to learn responsibility, and that means accepting the consequences for their own actions. I do however believe strongly that if a child is taught young what is right and wrong, along with respect for one self and others, and that it is OK to say no (just not to doing chores...) - it goes a long way. But in my opinion, most important in a child's life, is knowing that she is loved, and that a parent's love is unconditional.
It is easy to make a child, but to bring up a secure, healthy and happy child is a lifelong job, and the toughest one we can get. Luckily it is also the most rewarding!
None of us are perfect parents. We all make mistakes, say things we know we shouldn't, do things that probably does not always gain our children, and I suspect, never have enough time for them. But we try. My kids know there is no one who loves them more than I do. They know I will keep them safe, fed and clothed. They know they have rules to follow and limits on what they are allowed to do and watch because some things are not for children. They know that I expect them to always do their best in school and in all their activities (no I am not Chinese, but I do believe children need to be pushed to reach their full potential). They know that I will listen to their input (read arguments), but that I as their parent, have the final say, because I am the adult. So with all my faults, my children are still blossoming into wonderful preteens. Question is, will we survive the teenage years?
I am pretty certain they will turn out OK. There is nothing they could ever do, that would make me stop loving them. Nor anything that would make me even consider putting them on a bus to nowhere. What is wrong with people who expect young children to care for themselves? I understand that teens can be difficult; that some get caught up in drugs and violence. But if that happens, get help! Kicking them out on the street cannot ever be the solution, can it? I am not one who thinks it's OK to make excuses for kids' behaviour. They need to learn responsibility, and that means accepting the consequences for their own actions. I do however believe strongly that if a child is taught young what is right and wrong, along with respect for one self and others, and that it is OK to say no (just not to doing chores...) - it goes a long way. But in my opinion, most important in a child's life, is knowing that she is loved, and that a parent's love is unconditional.
It is easy to make a child, but to bring up a secure, healthy and happy child is a lifelong job, and the toughest one we can get. Luckily it is also the most rewarding!
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Dating vs. Friendship
I had the perfect summer fling last year; of my list of must haves in a guy, he was a perfect 10. And for the first time since leaving my marriage, I fell in love. The good times ended abruptly; however, when Yours Truly had a major meltdown, and decided to put it all in an email in the middle of the night. He apparently was not ready to deal with "the dark side" of Ms. Pink. Sadly, you don't get great make-up sex for meltdowns...that apparently only comes with arguments. Of course I wish I had thought of that before sending the infamous email, but I wasn't thinking too much at the time.
We have since made up and are now "friends". No we are not! It is impossible to be friends with someone you totally fell in love with. I know that some divorced couples manage to stay friendly; I try that too. When you have been in a partnership with someone over several years, you continue to care about their well being, and in many instances there are children to consider, but I dare to say that none are true friends. My "perfect man" and I text flirt; not during sex like some apparently like to do, but texting while on a date is not so bad...; we email, some times we talk on the phone, and very occasionally we meet for lunch. Basically we try to act like friends, but every time it stirs up all those good feelings again, and then the not so good ones when things go nowhere...again.
So we are moving on, but sadly, he seems to have ruined the whole dating experience for me. Rather than seeing the good in any other guy, they all get compared to him, and never really measure up. Someone said that love is the only cure for a broken heart. But it's hard to fall in love without really giving a guy a fair chance. Wish there was a cure! If you know of one, let me know!
We have since made up and are now "friends". No we are not! It is impossible to be friends with someone you totally fell in love with. I know that some divorced couples manage to stay friendly; I try that too. When you have been in a partnership with someone over several years, you continue to care about their well being, and in many instances there are children to consider, but I dare to say that none are true friends. My "perfect man" and I text flirt; not during sex like some apparently like to do, but texting while on a date is not so bad...; we email, some times we talk on the phone, and very occasionally we meet for lunch. Basically we try to act like friends, but every time it stirs up all those good feelings again, and then the not so good ones when things go nowhere...again.
So we are moving on, but sadly, he seems to have ruined the whole dating experience for me. Rather than seeing the good in any other guy, they all get compared to him, and never really measure up. Someone said that love is the only cure for a broken heart. But it's hard to fall in love without really giving a guy a fair chance. Wish there was a cure! If you know of one, let me know!
Monday, January 24, 2011
Texting During Sex???
Social Media overload? I admit, I am completely addicted to Facebook and can't go many hours without checking what's going on. A day without my email? Are you kidding? An hour without my phone? Not happening. But there are times I can do without any of it. During sex would be one of those times, but apparently not everybody thinks like me.
According to a 1000 person survey by Retrevo last year, 11% of people under the age of 25 and 6% of those over the age of 25 thinks it's OK to be interrupted by a text message during sex, and will actually stop to check the message.
I most be old fashioned, but if I can't keep a guy's attention even during sex, that would be the end of that story for me.....and it would cause a severe flare up of midlife crisis!!!
I most be old fashioned, but if I can't keep a guy's attention even during sex, that would be the end of that story for me.....and it would cause a severe flare up of midlife crisis!!!
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Dress for Success...or Not
Dear God, please let me remember I am getting older, and do not let me ever be seen like this Very Old Lady in a Thong!
Beauty, Brains or Both
Oscar Wilde once said "It's better to be beautiful than good, but it's better to be good than ugly!" There might still be some truth in that.
Pretty girls seem to get away with, and get their way a lot more than the less fortunate in the beauty department. Good girls get sympathy, but is no contest for the pretty girls; they do however, have a hand up on the ugly ones. And the same goes for guys.
Sadly I am not too good to admit that when I was younger, I always secretly wished for those pretty girls to fail miserably....when one ended up as a teen mom with a loser boyfriend, or another doubled in size and all of a sudden wasn't so pretty, or when one had been so busy being pretty, she almost failed high school and was not in any position to go to college, I would eagerly gossip about her with my friends. But that was a very short lived satisfaction.
Of course there was a time when I too wanted to be the prettiest girl at the party. Unfortunately I don't think that ever happened, and as I get older (thirtyten by now), that seems so much less important. Oh, I still try, but I'll be happy with "there is nothing wrong with her" at this point. So what are we to do when age sets in and beauty fades? Maybe that is when we find our true selves. I say like me for who I am, my personality, my opinions, my outlook on life and how I treat others. Then we'll have something to talk about as time goes on. Like me for my looks and we will have a very short lived relationship....there is only so much help in wrinkle creams and hair color.
It's human nature to want others to like us. We all want to hear how great we are, but at this point, I don't want to hear about my looks. I see myself in the mirror every day, so when I get the "oh you are so beautiful" line, obviously he's either lying, drunk or blind....and neither of those are very interesting. But I'll take that lie over what I received last week. This guy had asked me out, but we hadn't found a time that worked for both yet. After his apparently wonderful weekend, he texted me and stated "so sorry you couldn't be there, I was horny as hell". I'm sorry? What part of me agreeing to go out dancing translated to "she wants me... all of me"? And made him think that I would find that flattering? Needless to say, we're not going out after all.
Pretty girls seem to get away with, and get their way a lot more than the less fortunate in the beauty department. Good girls get sympathy, but is no contest for the pretty girls; they do however, have a hand up on the ugly ones. And the same goes for guys.
Sadly I am not too good to admit that when I was younger, I always secretly wished for those pretty girls to fail miserably....when one ended up as a teen mom with a loser boyfriend, or another doubled in size and all of a sudden wasn't so pretty, or when one had been so busy being pretty, she almost failed high school and was not in any position to go to college, I would eagerly gossip about her with my friends. But that was a very short lived satisfaction.
Of course there was a time when I too wanted to be the prettiest girl at the party. Unfortunately I don't think that ever happened, and as I get older (thirtyten by now), that seems so much less important. Oh, I still try, but I'll be happy with "there is nothing wrong with her" at this point. So what are we to do when age sets in and beauty fades? Maybe that is when we find our true selves. I say like me for who I am, my personality, my opinions, my outlook on life and how I treat others. Then we'll have something to talk about as time goes on. Like me for my looks and we will have a very short lived relationship....there is only so much help in wrinkle creams and hair color.
It's human nature to want others to like us. We all want to hear how great we are, but at this point, I don't want to hear about my looks. I see myself in the mirror every day, so when I get the "oh you are so beautiful" line, obviously he's either lying, drunk or blind....and neither of those are very interesting. But I'll take that lie over what I received last week. This guy had asked me out, but we hadn't found a time that worked for both yet. After his apparently wonderful weekend, he texted me and stated "so sorry you couldn't be there, I was horny as hell". I'm sorry? What part of me agreeing to go out dancing translated to "she wants me... all of me"? And made him think that I would find that flattering? Needless to say, we're not going out after all.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Cheering up!
Sometimes when I really feel sorry for myself and everything seems to be going wrong, I find comfort in laughing at others! When I think my body and wardrobe is completely middle age, it is good to know that somebody else is worse off.
The funnest place to look is Walmart.
How do people leave their house looking like this? Wouldn't the breeze on your rear end prompt you to at least make an attempt to cover the crack? But hey, at least I can say I look better in my jeans than this one!
For more fun pictures, check their webiste People of Walmart. After discovering this site, I will go to Macy's looking like a complete hag, but Walmart - not a chance! There is no way in hell you will ever see me on this site!
The funnest place to look is Walmart.
For more fun pictures, check their webiste People of Walmart. After discovering this site, I will go to Macy's looking like a complete hag, but Walmart - not a chance! There is no way in hell you will ever see me on this site!
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Computer survival for Ladies
Dear Tech support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow-down in overall system performance - particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, installation of Husband 1.0 seems to have uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed such other undesirable programs as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?
Sincerely,
Desperate
Dear Desperate:
First keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 is and Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.
Please enter the command "http:I Thought You Loved Me.htm" and try to download Tears 6.2, and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will automatically download the Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background which will eventually seize control of all your system resources).
Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. This is an unsupported application and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.
Good Luck,
Tech Support
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow-down in overall system performance - particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, installation of Husband 1.0 seems to have uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed such other undesirable programs as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?
Sincerely,
Desperate
Dear Desperate:
First keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 is and Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.
Please enter the command "http:I Thought You Loved Me.htm" and try to download Tears 6.2, and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will automatically download the Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background which will eventually seize control of all your system resources).
Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. This is an unsupported application and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.
Good Luck,
Tech Support
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Internet dating? No thank you!!
I know I mentioned this before, but this is why internet dating is not for me. Nobody tells the truth!!
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Sick and Tired
I'm usually a pretty perky person. I love life, and try to make the most of it. Work is part of "making the most of it" for me. If I didn't have to work, I would anyway, just not so much, and probably for a charity. Unfortunately the lottery numbers keep coming up wrong, so as most of us, I am still in the category of having to work.
I have some great co-workers and customers, and most of the time, I enjoy my work. But what I cannot stand, is to be talked down to and treated like a two-year old. The whole "let me prove to you who is the boss" attitude just irks me!! I have no idea what management course they teach this in, but they need to eliminate it!!
It is just not at work I see this. At the bank the other day, a man just went off on the teller when their computer system was slow. Like it was her fault? I finally got so irritated, I told him that maybe if he was a little nicer to people, there is a great chance he would get better service also. He got this puzzled look on his face like "What? My attitude has anything to do with how I am treated?" Idiot!!
It is no different than raising your children. Can you imagine how much progress your child would make if you never praised him or her for anything they did right, but only pointed out what they did wrong? Every day? That would be one insecure child! Adults are no different. I don't care how good you are at what you do. If you are never given recognition for anything you do right, it is only a matter of time before you stop caring about what you do. To me this is the basics of human interaction. The Golden Rule. Why are there still so many managers that can't figure this out?
Bottom line is, respect doesn't come with a title, it is earned. If you treat me and others like crap, guess what? We have no respect for you. Go figure!
I have some great co-workers and customers, and most of the time, I enjoy my work. But what I cannot stand, is to be talked down to and treated like a two-year old. The whole "let me prove to you who is the boss" attitude just irks me!! I have no idea what management course they teach this in, but they need to eliminate it!!
It is just not at work I see this. At the bank the other day, a man just went off on the teller when their computer system was slow. Like it was her fault? I finally got so irritated, I told him that maybe if he was a little nicer to people, there is a great chance he would get better service also. He got this puzzled look on his face like "What? My attitude has anything to do with how I am treated?" Idiot!!
It is no different than raising your children. Can you imagine how much progress your child would make if you never praised him or her for anything they did right, but only pointed out what they did wrong? Every day? That would be one insecure child! Adults are no different. I don't care how good you are at what you do. If you are never given recognition for anything you do right, it is only a matter of time before you stop caring about what you do. To me this is the basics of human interaction. The Golden Rule. Why are there still so many managers that can't figure this out?
Bottom line is, respect doesn't come with a title, it is earned. If you treat me and others like crap, guess what? We have no respect for you. Go figure!
Thursday, January 6, 2011
I'm no Cougar! Not a MILF either, I think; problem is more I can't tell age....
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Sunday, January 2, 2011
Happy New Year!
New year, new opportunities!
This year I celebrated New Year's Eve with my girlfriends. Girls' night out, and we had a blast! It would have been even better if I had not decided to wear my new shoes...they were awfully sexy with heals so high that my ass was almost back in place, but an hour or two in to the night, my toes were killing me!! Nothing a few drinks didn't help, so open bar was a good thing!
Anyway, we danced the night away, and started off the new year really feeling our age, but oh how much fun we had. Good thing it's a whole year till next time! We must have impressed somebody though, because by the end of the first day of the New Year, I had three invites for dates, so 2011 is really looking up.
I have great expectations for this year; career wise, health wise, and yes, in the romance department. Pretty sure this is my year!
Guess we'll find out!
Wish you all a happy and eventful 2011!!
This year I celebrated New Year's Eve with my girlfriends. Girls' night out, and we had a blast! It would have been even better if I had not decided to wear my new shoes...they were awfully sexy with heals so high that my ass was almost back in place, but an hour or two in to the night, my toes were killing me!! Nothing a few drinks didn't help, so open bar was a good thing!
Anyway, we danced the night away, and started off the new year really feeling our age, but oh how much fun we had. Good thing it's a whole year till next time! We must have impressed somebody though, because by the end of the first day of the New Year, I had three invites for dates, so 2011 is really looking up.
I have great expectations for this year; career wise, health wise, and yes, in the romance department. Pretty sure this is my year!
Guess we'll find out!
Wish you all a happy and eventful 2011!!
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