I've been slacking a bit with my blogging. Sorry about that. I have been cleaning house, and that took a lot more time that the space I live in should entail, but I live with children, and somehow the house never stays clean for more than a half hour, unless I clean when they are away for the weekend.
Anyway, I wanted to discuss predictable guys. You know, the ones that brings no excitement to the game, and you know exactly what will happen after the first or second date. Here's how it goes:
You go out on a date on Saturday. On Sunday, he may text you and tell you how much fun that was, but he will not call you until Tuesday. You'll make plans to go out again the following weekend, and he will text you mid-day Thursday to confirm, and call that evening to iron out the details. And then it goes on and on in that same boring pattern...So even if it's really fun when you go out, where is the fun in between? Hello! Tell me (don't text it!) what you really like about spending time with me. Talk to me about things that are important to you, and let's see if we agree, or can agree to disagree. Dinner and dancing is only fun for so long. I want the real person!
I asked a friend if they give out books on this in college that these guys live by for the rest of their lives, but he told me they were intimidated by me. Are you kidding? I am the sweetest, most lovable girl (read hag) around... why on earth would these guys be intimidated? And if they are, why do they have to stick to "the schedule"? If there is no book, I mean.
Dating is getting a bit boring at this rate, so I am reevaluating whether it's worth it or not. Then again, if I stop going out on dates, what will I blog about?
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Beach Bodies
So my business idea for spring break was not nearly as successful as I had hoped, and after careful review of my week on the beach, I think I might have picked the wrong beach. See for yourself.
The majority of the visitors on the beach, were women like these (actually this might be my friend and I, but most looked like this...which when I think about it, if this is what I look like, then no wonder my sales were low...)
or this...
But no, either they were too busy showing off this winter's "hard work* at the gym,
Or they were with the wife,
or they were not my target market....
or this...
On this big of a beach, you would think there would be at least a few potential customers....
But no, either they were too busy showing off this winter's "hard work* at the gym,
Or they were with the wife,
or they were not my target market....This poor guy was the only one who seemed to be in the right demographic group to actually buy a shot, but he messed with the local kids, and then this happened.
Still broke and working on some new ideas for the summer.....
Friday, March 25, 2011
Woman files criminal charges against masseur after finding out he was not gay
The last few days there has been some hilarious stories in the news. One dumber than the next.
Today let me bring to you the story of a Jersey City woman who got massages regularly at her fitness center. The masseur asked her if she wanted her breasts and buttocks rubbed down, and because she thought this was regular practice and he, in her mind, was "obviously gay", she agreed. However, hours later, after her girlfriend informed her that he was not gay and that he had a girlfriend, she went to the police and filed criminal charges for sexual contact.
Are you kidding me? If this actually goes to court, I want to see the attorney defending her assumption of his sexual orientation. Maybe she should have been clearer when she gave her consent: "Yes, you may rub down my breast and buttocks if you are gay!"
Today let me bring to you the story of a Jersey City woman who got massages regularly at her fitness center. The masseur asked her if she wanted her breasts and buttocks rubbed down, and because she thought this was regular practice and he, in her mind, was "obviously gay", she agreed. However, hours later, after her girlfriend informed her that he was not gay and that he had a girlfriend, she went to the police and filed criminal charges for sexual contact.
Are you kidding me? If this actually goes to court, I want to see the attorney defending her assumption of his sexual orientation. Maybe she should have been clearer when she gave her consent: "Yes, you may rub down my breast and buttocks if you are gay!"
Massage pictures courtesy of www.massagenerd.com
I love getting massages, and my little Damen can put his hands anywhere he likes...I think he is gay too, but it really doesn't make a difference; he is a licenced masseur and is just doing his job. As much as he makes me feel like I'm in Heaven, I am sadly afraid he doesn't give me or any other customers much thought once the massage is over...on the other hand, if this woman prevails in court, I'm pretty sure I have a good case too!
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Woman fires at neighbour after he denies her a kiss
I guess some handle rejection better than others. Helen Staudinger from Florida, apparently does not handle rejection at all. She allegedly visited her neighbour and grew angry when he did not want to kiss her. The rest of us, I presume, would take the hint and move on, but not Ms. Staudinger. She picked up her semiautomatic pistol and shot a few rounds into his house.
The kicker? She is 92(!!!) - while her neighbour is a mere 53. Helen is a true cougar in other words.
The kicker? She is 92(!!!) - while her neighbour is a mere 53. Helen is a true cougar in other words.
I guess she doesn't have to worry too much about where to live the rest of her life and how to pay for it...
Monday, March 21, 2011
For better or worse
Even with the staggering divorce rates, I would hope that most people enter into a marriage with the intent of spending their lives together - for better or worse, through sickness and health, isn't that what we promise at the altar?
But for some apparently career comes before everything else. Guatemala's first lady, Sandra Torres de Colom, wants the same opportunities as her husband, President Alvaro Colom. Apparently they have some pesky, little law preventing relatives of the current president from running for office. But Sandra found a way around that one. She is now divorcing him to be able to run as the next presidential candidate.
I guess she showed them! But I wonder if the president will object. How unfair would that be that he doesn't get to share in running the country if she wins, when she got to be part of his presidency?
A little drastic maybe, but why couldn't Laura Bush have come up with that idea after her husband's first four years in office? I am convinced she would have done a hell of a better job than he did his second term!!!
But for some apparently career comes before everything else. Guatemala's first lady, Sandra Torres de Colom, wants the same opportunities as her husband, President Alvaro Colom. Apparently they have some pesky, little law preventing relatives of the current president from running for office. But Sandra found a way around that one. She is now divorcing him to be able to run as the next presidential candidate.
Dreams and such
I have always believed there is more between Heaven and Earth than meets the eye. I believe in God, I believe in angels and I strongly believe in karma. What goes around comes around. Ghosts? I question that a little bit, but I have had experiences myself that makes me at least wonder if there might be some poor souls stuck in the "in-between". Does that make me weird? Maybe so, but that's who I am.
Aliens on the other hand...no. I agree the universe is huge, and it would almost be strange if Earth is the only place there is anything living, but small green men in flying saucers? No.
Nor am I a big believer that dreams are anything more than your creative side or sub conscience taking over and entertaining while you sleep. Growing up I would spend countless hours day dreaming, and that, in my mind, is no more than fantasizing about what you want to happen, so why should it be much different at night? I frequently wake up with a smile on my face because of some very pleasant dreams, but that does not make me think they have a bigger meaning.
However, some do not share my opinions on dreams and aliens. Mr. Hagar, former lead singer for Van Halen is now apparently convinced he was abducted by aliens. Really? Can you say sex, drugs and Rock'n Roll???? Sammy, they were not aliens, and probably not green, unless you gave them too much to drink or a drug they couldn't handle. Just saying.
Aliens on the other hand...no. I agree the universe is huge, and it would almost be strange if Earth is the only place there is anything living, but small green men in flying saucers? No.
Nor am I a big believer that dreams are anything more than your creative side or sub conscience taking over and entertaining while you sleep. Growing up I would spend countless hours day dreaming, and that, in my mind, is no more than fantasizing about what you want to happen, so why should it be much different at night? I frequently wake up with a smile on my face because of some very pleasant dreams, but that does not make me think they have a bigger meaning.
However, some do not share my opinions on dreams and aliens. Mr. Hagar, former lead singer for Van Halen is now apparently convinced he was abducted by aliens. Really? Can you say sex, drugs and Rock'n Roll???? Sammy, they were not aliens, and probably not green, unless you gave them too much to drink or a drug they couldn't handle. Just saying.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Happy St. Patrick's Day!
A man proposed to his girlfriend on St. Patrick's Day. However, he had put a fake stone in the ring. His girlfriend did not notice until she a year later took the ring to a jeweler to get it cleaned. When she confronted him regarding the fake stone, he replied: "Well, I proposed on St. Patrick's Day and thought it was fitting to use a sham rock." hahahaha
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Facebook Addict?
One night I was checking out what was happening on Facebook, my kids told me I must not love them very much since I chose to waste my time on Facebook rather than having quality time with them. They are pretty good at playing the guilt card for their age! They apparently also discuss these issues with their friends, because I was informed that several other mothers and fathers lack the love for their children and waste their time on the computer too. "How can Facebook be more important than me?"
I admit I probably spend too much time on Facebook, but I try not to let it interfere with my time with the kids or friends. Some; however, have taken the addiction to a whole new level. MSN ran an article re. Facebook addiction, and you can check here if its time for you to quit. I nodded a couple of times, but think I can safely keep my page for now.
I admit I probably spend too much time on Facebook, but I try not to let it interfere with my time with the kids or friends. Some; however, have taken the addiction to a whole new level. MSN ran an article re. Facebook addiction, and you can check here if its time for you to quit. I nodded a couple of times, but think I can safely keep my page for now.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Basking In the Sun
Oh dear! With my spring break business idea, I apparently spent a bit too much time in the sun....
SPF 75 tomorrow....
Monday, March 14, 2011
Friend vs. Boyfriend
I have a theory. Even though I have quite a few male friends, I have always said that most men and women are not capable of being close friends because sex always gets in the way. It is not just the men...hello, we're sexual creatures too. Even though great friendships may evolve between men and women, I still think that sooner or later one of them will want to move it to another level, and the friendship is forever altered.
Some move on to "friends with benefits" and have no-strings-attached-sex, but that too is doomed in my mind. One will always want it to be more. And just as in the movie No Strings Attached with Natalie Portman & Ashton Kutcher, if the person is a friend that you truly value, and you also find him so attractive you want to have sex with him (I'm saying him, because I believe many more men than women would have sex without putting much thought into it), haven't you just found someone you really would like to date?
My solution to this is to be friends with married men or men whom I don't at all find attractive. Notwithstanding a few "drunk offers", that has worked well so far. And now that age and gravity is setting in and any good looks went down the toilet, there should be no more worries of any of them finding me attractive. My friendships are safe.
Some move on to "friends with benefits" and have no-strings-attached-sex, but that too is doomed in my mind. One will always want it to be more. And just as in the movie No Strings Attached with Natalie Portman & Ashton Kutcher, if the person is a friend that you truly value, and you also find him so attractive you want to have sex with him (I'm saying him, because I believe many more men than women would have sex without putting much thought into it), haven't you just found someone you really would like to date?
My solution to this is to be friends with married men or men whom I don't at all find attractive. Notwithstanding a few "drunk offers", that has worked well so far. And now that age and gravity is setting in and any good looks went down the toilet, there should be no more worries of any of them finding me attractive. My friendships are safe.
Showing off the purse
I was driving behind this lady yesterday (hence the poor quality picture). First I thought she had left her purse on top of the car by mistake, but then I noticed she was holding on to it. She then pulled it back in the car, only to place it back on top of the car a couple of minutes later. WTF?
Nice purse, but wouldn't it be safer to show it off when you stop somewhere? Just saying...
Nice purse, but wouldn't it be safer to show it off when you stop somewhere? Just saying...
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Beach Body
A local radio station is having a spring break photo contest - send in a picture of your butt in a thong and win $500. We were in the car when they played the commercial for the contest, and I jokingly said I am sending in a picture of my butt.
Thank God for honest kids: "Are you kidding mom? Your butt is way too big." says one. "No" says the other, "it's too flat". "Like two pumpkins," says the first one. "More like two squished pumpkins," concluded the other.
Thanks kids!
Thank God for honest kids: "Are you kidding mom? Your butt is way too big." says one. "No" says the other, "it's too flat". "Like two pumpkins," says the first one. "More like two squished pumpkins," concluded the other.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Charlie Sheen
Gotta love this guy. No matter what he did, it never seemed to effect his career, until now. After his endless round of interviews, he has now filed $100 million law suit against Warner Bros. Can't wait to see this one play out in the media!
In the mean time, enjoy this video. Guess there is no doubt he thinks he'll win this one too!
In the mean time, enjoy this video. Guess there is no doubt he thinks he'll win this one too!
The L Size
It's finally here! For all of you who cannot fit into the H, J, K or KK size bra - the L size has arrived! The lingerie company Bravissimo introduced this bra earlier this year, since the average breast size apparently has grown over the last 10 years (I totally missed out on that one!).
Now, if an L size actually fits you, I have just one question: Did you have basketballs implanted?
Now, if an L size actually fits you, I have just one question: Did you have basketballs implanted?
Trying desperately to fill in my B cups (it's the only time I've been happy with not having an A or A+), I am jealous of the C's and D's, but seriously, anything bigger than a handful is a waste...and you are welcome to the monster-man with hands big enough to hold an L size.
As with anything else, I spent some time pondering what it would be like having these melons attached to your chest, and I can't find anything positive with it, unless you're a stripper. I would think you could fit quite a few dollar bills between the two, but in any other instance, it seems they would just be a nuisance.
Just imagine trying to jog with L size boobs. You better have a good secure bra, otherwise I would think you could get a few "bounces" in the chin. Bruised by boobs - that would be kind of embarrassing to explain, don't you think? How about laying in bed watching TV? In your 20's they would completely block the view. In your 30's I guess you could balance a plate or a glass on them, which I guess could be useful. In your 40's on the other hand, I imagine it would be like having pillows under your arms. Guess it could be good for something.
Just imagine trying to jog with L size boobs. You better have a good secure bra, otherwise I would think you could get a few "bounces" in the chin. Bruised by boobs - that would be kind of embarrassing to explain, don't you think? How about laying in bed watching TV? In your 20's they would completely block the view. In your 30's I guess you could balance a plate or a glass on them, which I guess could be useful. In your 40's on the other hand, I imagine it would be like having pillows under your arms. Guess it could be good for something.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Bieber Fever
I like to start my day off with the Elvis Duran show on the radio. Today they played this segment from a Justin Bieber concert where they had given away passes to a meet and greet with the Bieber.
Unfortunately not everybody got to meet him. OMG! If I had ever acted like this 13-year old, I am pretty certain my mother would have never brought me anywhere ever again. However, the ones that did meet him were not much better. I remember watching old film clips from the Beatles and Elvis concerts thinking that those girls were completely crazy, but apparently girls today are no different. Talk about star struck!
Unfortunately not everybody got to meet him. OMG! If I had ever acted like this 13-year old, I am pretty certain my mother would have never brought me anywhere ever again. However, the ones that did meet him were not much better. I remember watching old film clips from the Beatles and Elvis concerts thinking that those girls were completely crazy, but apparently girls today are no different. Talk about star struck!
Monday, March 7, 2011
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Lost in abbreviations
If you're like me, you are having a tough time keeping up with the language of the younger crowd. I consistently get text messages, comments on Facebook or chat entries that I look at with a blank stare and have no idea what means. I consider myself a fairly smart person, but every week there seems to be a new abbreviation that I have not seen before and that I for the life of me cannot figure out.
Luckily I am not the only one who has only caught on to LOL, LMAO and WTF, and a kind soul has taken pity on us and created our own abbreviations dictionary. Now I can finally understand what these people are saying!
So OATUS, I had a totally awkward moment this weekend. Ran into one guy I've dated while out with another...as I'm RME and thinking WTH, do you have to come to the same place as me? He walks up introduces himself. I found that to be 2M2H and saw it as the perfect moment to excuse myself and go to the bathroom with a BBIAM. Yeah, I'm getting the hang of this. Who said you can't teach an old dog new tricks?
Luckily I am not the only one who has only caught on to LOL, LMAO and WTF, and a kind soul has taken pity on us and created our own abbreviations dictionary. Now I can finally understand what these people are saying!
So OATUS, I had a totally awkward moment this weekend. Ran into one guy I've dated while out with another...as I'm RME and thinking WTH, do you have to come to the same place as me? He walks up introduces himself. I found that to be 2M2H and saw it as the perfect moment to excuse myself and go to the bathroom with a BBIAM. Yeah, I'm getting the hang of this. Who said you can't teach an old dog new tricks?
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Business Idea
Since I recently lost my job, I have been exploring new business ideas, and have received lots of helpful hints from friends and prior co-workers. Today I got the best one though, and with spring break coming up, I have packed my bags and am heading for the beach. Surely, this is a winner!!!
Margarita tits! If this lady can do it, so can I. Look out spring breakers!! This should certainly pay my bills for the month!
Friday, March 4, 2011
His Name is Fred!
I don't mind that other women are happily married. But is is necessary to rub it in?
I went to a meeting for one of my children's activities, run by a married couple. They're both very nice, but the wife apparently can never remember her husband's name. For half an hour I listened to her speak, and every time she mentioned something he is responsible for, owns or is involved in, it was the "my husband" this and "my husband" that. Not once did she say his name, he or his or any other possible description.
As I was getting more and more aware of her "my husband" and feeling that she was just rubbing it in to the rest of us that don't have a husband, a boyfriend, or are barely dating, I just wanted to scream: "His name is Fred! Use the poor man's name! We know he is your husband. None of us want him, he is all yours, but for God's sake, his name is Fred!"
Fortunately for once, I thought before speaking, and remained silent. They already think I'm kind of weird, I guess I didn't need to confirm it.
Instead I started picking the happy married couple apart. In my mind, of course. But after finding all their faults; she is fat, has no fashion sense, needs new skin care - and please put on some make up! And she tells really bad jokes. He is way too skinny, needs a haircut badly, and really needs new pants that actually covers his ankles. Then I imagined them having a nice romantic dinner at home - her eating all the food and him getting just a little portion on his plate; just enough to keep him going. Add a couple of bottles of wine, and voila, there's a comedy show in the making - at least in my mind.
My imagination took off a little, and I found it so funny I started giggling out loud. All of a sudden, I had the eyes of the whole group on me. Apparently it was really bad timing for my giggling session. "No ma'am, I agree, there is nothing funny about sexual predators."
So much for not confirming weird...
I went to a meeting for one of my children's activities, run by a married couple. They're both very nice, but the wife apparently can never remember her husband's name. For half an hour I listened to her speak, and every time she mentioned something he is responsible for, owns or is involved in, it was the "my husband" this and "my husband" that. Not once did she say his name, he or his or any other possible description.
As I was getting more and more aware of her "my husband" and feeling that she was just rubbing it in to the rest of us that don't have a husband, a boyfriend, or are barely dating, I just wanted to scream: "His name is Fred! Use the poor man's name! We know he is your husband. None of us want him, he is all yours, but for God's sake, his name is Fred!"
Fortunately for once, I thought before speaking, and remained silent. They already think I'm kind of weird, I guess I didn't need to confirm it.
Instead I started picking the happy married couple apart. In my mind, of course. But after finding all their faults; she is fat, has no fashion sense, needs new skin care - and please put on some make up! And she tells really bad jokes. He is way too skinny, needs a haircut badly, and really needs new pants that actually covers his ankles. Then I imagined them having a nice romantic dinner at home - her eating all the food and him getting just a little portion on his plate; just enough to keep him going. Add a couple of bottles of wine, and voila, there's a comedy show in the making - at least in my mind.
My imagination took off a little, and I found it so funny I started giggling out loud. All of a sudden, I had the eyes of the whole group on me. Apparently it was really bad timing for my giggling session. "No ma'am, I agree, there is nothing funny about sexual predators."
So much for not confirming weird...
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Photo Shoot
I don't know what I was thinking. For my Facebook account, I have yet to get a presentable picture, but somehow I thought that today was the day. Yeah, that was a real pick-me-upper - NOT!
How is it possible to take 22 pictures and not have a single one turn out even close to decent? I looked at myself in the mirror prior to taking these, and I did not look like that! If not everybody else's pictures turned out so nicely, I would return the damn camera for only capturing ugly!
I looked through the the instructions, but there were no settings that specifically stated elimates wrinkles and makes a smirk look like a great smile....maybe it's time for some of these camera stores to not only offer classes on how to take good pictures, but also on how to be in one without showing all your worst features. I really need that class!
Im going to the bathroom now to look in the mirror again - because either it or the camera is lying!! I really hope it is the latter.
How is it possible to take 22 pictures and not have a single one turn out even close to decent? I looked at myself in the mirror prior to taking these, and I did not look like that! If not everybody else's pictures turned out so nicely, I would return the damn camera for only capturing ugly!
I looked through the the instructions, but there were no settings that specifically stated elimates wrinkles and makes a smirk look like a great smile....maybe it's time for some of these camera stores to not only offer classes on how to take good pictures, but also on how to be in one without showing all your worst features. I really need that class!
Im going to the bathroom now to look in the mirror again - because either it or the camera is lying!! I really hope it is the latter.
Our World
I have spent my morning looking at different news sites searching for something to be opinionated about today. There is just too much bad stuff going on, and too many sad stories. I don't feel like being sad, so instead, let's talk about how lucky we are to be born in the Western World!
Here in the good ol' USA, as a woman, I have all the choices I want. Yes, I agree, the corporate world is still to a large extent ruled by the middle aged men, and women tend to have to work harder and show better results to move up the corporate ladder. Nonetheless, the opportunities are all here.
Here I am free. I make my own choices. Nobody owns me - even with the horrific history of slavery, the idea of human beings as a commodity died with the end of slavery. Not so in too many places still. Every time I think of what women in the Middle East, certain parts of Asia and Africa has to endure, I count my blessings for being born in a Western country.
Even in today's world, countless girls and women in Africa are being mutilated so they will be "pure" resulting in lifelong pain. Girls are being attacked with acid - for getting an education. Educated women in Iran, are being reduced to beggars if they lose their husbands, since they are not allowed to work. Not to make this in to a man-bashing session, but who came up with all these idiotic ideas? Oh yeah, men who are afraid they would lose their power if women were given equal, or any rights.
OK, now I feel like standing up on my soap box, so it is probably time to stop. To all the women in the Western World - count your blessings! I hope that in my lifetime, we will see an uprising of the suppressed women of the world, and support from all the decent men who know what is happening today is wrong, to ensure these women too can enjoy the freedom and choices that we have!
Here in the good ol' USA, as a woman, I have all the choices I want. Yes, I agree, the corporate world is still to a large extent ruled by the middle aged men, and women tend to have to work harder and show better results to move up the corporate ladder. Nonetheless, the opportunities are all here.
Here I am free. I make my own choices. Nobody owns me - even with the horrific history of slavery, the idea of human beings as a commodity died with the end of slavery. Not so in too many places still. Every time I think of what women in the Middle East, certain parts of Asia and Africa has to endure, I count my blessings for being born in a Western country.
Even in today's world, countless girls and women in Africa are being mutilated so they will be "pure" resulting in lifelong pain. Girls are being attacked with acid - for getting an education. Educated women in Iran, are being reduced to beggars if they lose their husbands, since they are not allowed to work. Not to make this in to a man-bashing session, but who came up with all these idiotic ideas? Oh yeah, men who are afraid they would lose their power if women were given equal, or any rights.
OK, now I feel like standing up on my soap box, so it is probably time to stop. To all the women in the Western World - count your blessings! I hope that in my lifetime, we will see an uprising of the suppressed women of the world, and support from all the decent men who know what is happening today is wrong, to ensure these women too can enjoy the freedom and choices that we have!
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Relationships and Satisfying Women
According to Chris Rock, one of my favourite comedians, we are not so easy to satisfy. Enjoy!
warning: as always, Mr. Rock uses a bit explicit language.
warning: as always, Mr. Rock uses a bit explicit language.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Teen Relationship Abuse
This was shocking to me, but according to Yahoo News one in five teens are in relationships where they are physically abused by their partner. One in five!! And these are teenagers. Where did we go wrong?
Not all abusers are men, or in this instance, boys, but the statistics clearly show they are the majority. Where did they learn that it is OK to hit, slap or otherwise abuse their girlfriends? These statistics are sickening to me. As much focus as there has been on abuse the last few years, how can it be that 20% of dating teenagers still abuse their girlfriends?
After Rhianna so bravely told her story of being beaten by Chris Brown, I had hoped that more teenagers would look to her as a good example. That doesn't seem to have happened.
Obviously we have not only failed miserably in teaching the boys proper manners, but we have completely failed in teaching these girls self worth. I am not so blue eyed that I don't believe a fight between a boy- and girlfriend can escalate to become physical; although, I truly believe that it should never happen. But I do not understand why these girls think they have to stick around for more. Every girl should know that she deserves the best - and that does not include being beaten or abused psychologically. If she was unfortunate to end up in such a situation once; leave! Don't allow it to ever happen again!
Back in the days when I was 16, I dated a boy, who turned out to be a complete freak. Although he never physically hurt me, he was always playing mind games, and to a large extent, taking "ownership" of all my time. The whole break up was a weird session in itself, and he begged me to come back to him. Luckily I refused. However, the following weekend, he showed up at the party where I was. He was drunk as can be, and again begging me to come back to him. This time, when I refused, he pulled out a knife and threatened to kill himself. Normally, I would think, it would be easy to disarm a person that intoxicated; however, he also had a black belt in karate, so nobody was willing to take the chance of getting a good beating or getting stabbed. We ended up getting a hold of his brother, also with a black belt, who got the knife from him and calmed him down. By then, I of course was hysterical, but I will never forget his brother walking up to me and looking me straight in the eyes as he said: "You know this is all your fault. If you would just love him, this would have never happened!" If I was insecure in any way, I probably would have gone back to him. I would probably have felt responsible for the whole episode, as well as his ongoing well being. But bless my parents; they did a good job! Instead I looked his brother right back in the eyes and told him it was not my fault their whole family were freaks, turned my back and went back to the party, and never spoke to either of them again.
I didn't stop there though, but managed to make more bad relationship decisions in my life, and have on a couple of occasions ended up with black eyes. But I have never accepted it! Despite the incredible shame one feels as the victim in such a situation, I filed charges against the man (this was prior to the police being able to file the charges without the victim's consent), and demanded punishment. Not once have I ever stopped believing that I deserve the best!
I hope that as my children grow into their teens, that they too are secure enough in themselves to not accept anything but the best. That they treat others with respect, and don't allow anyone to treat them otherwise. I certainly hope that by then , these statistics have changed drastically for the better!
Not all abusers are men, or in this instance, boys, but the statistics clearly show they are the majority. Where did they learn that it is OK to hit, slap or otherwise abuse their girlfriends? These statistics are sickening to me. As much focus as there has been on abuse the last few years, how can it be that 20% of dating teenagers still abuse their girlfriends?
After Rhianna so bravely told her story of being beaten by Chris Brown, I had hoped that more teenagers would look to her as a good example. That doesn't seem to have happened.
Obviously we have not only failed miserably in teaching the boys proper manners, but we have completely failed in teaching these girls self worth. I am not so blue eyed that I don't believe a fight between a boy- and girlfriend can escalate to become physical; although, I truly believe that it should never happen. But I do not understand why these girls think they have to stick around for more. Every girl should know that she deserves the best - and that does not include being beaten or abused psychologically. If she was unfortunate to end up in such a situation once; leave! Don't allow it to ever happen again!
Back in the days when I was 16, I dated a boy, who turned out to be a complete freak. Although he never physically hurt me, he was always playing mind games, and to a large extent, taking "ownership" of all my time. The whole break up was a weird session in itself, and he begged me to come back to him. Luckily I refused. However, the following weekend, he showed up at the party where I was. He was drunk as can be, and again begging me to come back to him. This time, when I refused, he pulled out a knife and threatened to kill himself. Normally, I would think, it would be easy to disarm a person that intoxicated; however, he also had a black belt in karate, so nobody was willing to take the chance of getting a good beating or getting stabbed. We ended up getting a hold of his brother, also with a black belt, who got the knife from him and calmed him down. By then, I of course was hysterical, but I will never forget his brother walking up to me and looking me straight in the eyes as he said: "You know this is all your fault. If you would just love him, this would have never happened!" If I was insecure in any way, I probably would have gone back to him. I would probably have felt responsible for the whole episode, as well as his ongoing well being. But bless my parents; they did a good job! Instead I looked his brother right back in the eyes and told him it was not my fault their whole family were freaks, turned my back and went back to the party, and never spoke to either of them again.
I didn't stop there though, but managed to make more bad relationship decisions in my life, and have on a couple of occasions ended up with black eyes. But I have never accepted it! Despite the incredible shame one feels as the victim in such a situation, I filed charges against the man (this was prior to the police being able to file the charges without the victim's consent), and demanded punishment. Not once have I ever stopped believing that I deserve the best!
I hope that as my children grow into their teens, that they too are secure enough in themselves to not accept anything but the best. That they treat others with respect, and don't allow anyone to treat them otherwise. I certainly hope that by then , these statistics have changed drastically for the better!
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