His Name is Fred!

I don't mind that other women are happily married.  But is is necessary to rub it in?

I went to a meeting for one of my children's activities, run by a married couple.  They're both very nice, but the wife apparently can never remember her husband's name.  For half an hour I listened to her speak, and every time she mentioned something he is responsible for, owns or is involved in, it was the "my husband" this and "my husband" that.  Not once did she say his name, he or his or any other possible description.

As I was getting more and more aware of her "my husband" and feeling that she was just rubbing it in to the rest of us that don't have a husband, a boyfriend, or are barely dating, I just wanted to scream: "His name is Fred!  Use the poor man's name!  We know he is your husband.  None of us want him, he is all yours, but  for God's sake, his name is Fred!"

Fortunately for once, I thought before speaking, and remained silent. They already think I'm kind of weird, I guess I didn't need to confirm it.

Instead I started picking the happy married couple apart.  In my mind, of course.  But after finding all their faults; she is fat, has no fashion sense, needs new skin care - and please put on some make up! And she tells really bad jokes.  He is way too skinny, needs a haircut badly, and really needs new pants that actually covers his ankles. Then I imagined them having a nice romantic dinner at home - her eating all the food and him getting just a little portion on his plate; just enough to keep him going.  Add a couple of bottles of wine, and voila, there's a comedy show in the making - at least in my mind.

My imagination took off a little, and I found it so funny I started giggling out loud. All of a sudden, I had the eyes of the whole group on me.  Apparently it was really bad timing for my giggling session.  "No ma'am, I agree, there is nothing funny about sexual predators."

So much for not confirming weird...